


so pretty it hurts.

by fairyy



Category: Love Victor (TV 2020)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, F/F, Getting Together
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-07
Updated: 2020-09-07
Packaged: 2021-03-06 17:13:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,693
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26332447
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fairyy/pseuds/fairyy
Summary: Lake thinks guys are hot.Benji is absolutely gorgeous, even if she’s in no way his type. Andrew is too, tall and muscular and funny, even if he can be kind of an asshole. All of the jocks, boys in college she flirts with that are way too old for her.But. Girls are hot too, and Lake doesn’t know what to do with that.
Relationships: Mia Brooks/Lake Meriwether
Comments: 7
Kudos: 32





	so pretty it hurts.

**Author's Note:**

> title from girls by girl in red because, of course it is.

Lake thinks guys are hot. 

Benji is absolutely gorgeous, even if she’s in no way his type. Andrew is too, tall and muscular and funny, even if he can be kind of an asshole. All of the jocks, boys in college she flirts with that are way too old for her. 

But. Girls are hot too, and Lake doesn’t know what to do with that. 

-

Lake took art with Mia freshman year. Mia’s genuinely a good artist, and Lake just needed to get a credit out of the way. 

Mia is so passionate about art. Lake is infatuated with the way she explains different techniques and artists she looks up to. Lake doesn’t really care, but Mia makes things interesting. Not that Lake would admit it to anyone if they asked, though. 

They have an assignment midway through the year - drawing someone else’s portrait. The teacher could care less who works with who, so Lake makes sure she grabs Mia before anyone else can try. 

Not that Mia would probably even do that, but Lake still feels the jealousy in her stomach when sweet girls and shy boys come up to ask her. 

She likes this as much as she hates it. Her eyes track over Mia’s face, memorizing it. She has an excuse this time, even if her drawing turns out like shit. 

“What’s that face?” Mia asks, laughing. 

“What’s your face?” Lake’s heart rate picks up a little. She was staring at Mia while she worked too intently. 

Mia rolls her eyes. “C’mon Lake. If you keep that up I’m gonna get a bad grade on this.”

“Like you’ve ever gotten a bad grade in your life.”

“Hey, that’s not true. Ms. Smith hated me. She said I tried too hard. How do you try too hard in 7th grade English?”

“I guess she just didn’t expect such _sophisticated_ essays to come from a twelve year old.” 

Mia laughs and turns back to her drawing. She’s so pretty. Lake hates it. 

-

Lake manages to scrape by in art with a B, with Mia’s help. Okay, maybe Lake was putting a little less effort into it so Mia would help her, but no one needs to know that. 

Not that she needed an excuse to hang out with Mia really, but when Mia was explaining how to draw an eye to Lake for the third time, she would sit a little closer so Lake could see. Their shoulders would touch, and their hands would brush. Lake’s not above doing whatever she can to hold onto the feeling that brings her. 

At the end of the year, Mia gives Lake the couple of drawings she did of her. Lake hangs them up until her mom comments how they don’t match the theme of her room. 

-

Lake has spent years trying to figure out if she actually _likes_ girls or if she just wants to be them. 

Her mom has given her lots of insecurities over the years. It’s hard being the daughter of the most well known newscaster in the city, when her mom has been doing everything in her power to look younger, thinner, better on camera for as long as Lake can remember. 

She remembers her first trip to Victoria’s Secret. She spent more time looking at the models than she did at the bras she was supposed to be buying. Her mom would just shoot down her opinions anyway. 

Lake wanted to _be_ them, so badly. Her body doesn’t look like theirs, and she knows it. Her mom has started to comment on her diet and exercise habits lately. But maybe that’s not all. 

They’re so pretty. Lake lets her mind wander while her mom picks out exactly what she wants Lake to wear. And Lake wants. 

-

Lake and Mia have been close since they were kids. 

Lake is sometimes surprised Mia still wants to hang out with her as much as she does. It’s not like it’s a bad thing, but she’s seen so many of her friends have falling outs as they grew up, or naturally drift apart. 

Her and Mia never drifted apart, and they certainly never had a dramatic fight that ended their friendship. They had their moments, sure, but they’ve always stuck. 

Mia has been through so much and Lake was there through it all. Mia spent more nights at Lake’s house than her own when her mom left. Lake got used to Mia sharing her bed for most of that month, and was more upset than she thought she would be when Mia stopped staying over as much. Mia was getting better, though, and that was a good thing. 

She looked happy again. 

-

Lake has made out with girls at parties before, under the guise of doing it for the attention of a boy. 

It works, which makes Lake feel a little weird. She’s spent a year telling herself the lipstick flavored kisses didn’t _mean_ anything, but it’s getting harder and harder to deny. 

But then she’ll find a cute boy who’s willing to give her attention, and she puts everything else in the back of her mind. 

-

Mia didn’t like Lake’s eighth grade boyfriend. Lake was never really sure why. Sure, he was a bit of a dick, but what fourteen year old boy isn't?

He was cute enough and he held her hand in the hallways and kissed her at movie theater dates. But Mia didn’t like him, and for some reason that was important to Lake.

He was with another girl, a prettier girl, a week after they broke up. Lake tried not to be too hurt about it. 

It wasn’t actually that hard, when Mia invited her over for a sleepover and bought two pints of ice cream. They watched a shitty rom-com and giggled until they fell asleep, curled up under the same blanket on the couch.

A few weeks later they went to the eighth grade dance together, just the two of them. Lake felt better than she had all year.

\- 

Mia lets Lake throw parties at her house sometimes. With her dad gone all the time, Lake thinks they should take advantage of it. 

Mia usually grumbles about it, but Lake knows she doesn’t really mind. Besides, Lake thinks it’s good for Mia to live a little, have some company, have something to distract her. Lake always helps her clean up afterwards, so Mia gives in. 

Lake sometimes tries to play spin the bottle, secretly hoping her turn will land on Mia. Mia’s only ever played once. She landed on Andrew. 

Mia didn’t even kiss him. She stood up, glared at him, and went upstairs. She’s never played again after that. Lake can’t help but hope she might change her mind. 

-

They’re getting ready for a party when it hits Lake.

“Can you paint my nails?” she asks. Her nails are _chipping_. They need to be fixed ASAP.

Mia rolls her eyes, but she goes to her bathroom and pulls out her box of nail polish anyway.

“What color do you want?”

Lake thinks for a minute. She’s wearing pink tonight and she had an idea in mind that would match. She ignores it. “I can’t decide. You pick.”

Mia gives her a look, but shrugs. “You can’t be mad if you don’t like it.”

“I promise I won’t be. Or I’ll try not to be. Hurry up though, I don’t want my nails to be wet when people get here.”

Mia picks a pretty blue. They look nice, even if it’s not a color Lake would have chosen for herself. 

But the best part is how Mia’s hands are on hers, how soft they are. 

She _likes_ Mia. She doesn’t even know what that would entail, being with a girl for real. She hasn't always been immune to the casual homophobia, the looks girls get for daring to be different. 

It might be the big, fairly accepting city of Atlanta, but it’s still Georgia. What would her parents even say? She knows her mom wouldn’t stand for it, and her dad is politely disinterested in discussing issues that matter. 

Lake decides not to think about it for the rest of the night. 

(Then she sees Mia getting cozy with a senior, and that goes out the window).

-

Lake takes some time to think about it, and when she does, her crush on Mia makes sense.

Lake would always make excuses to be near her, grab her hand to pull her away when it wasn’t strictly necessary, make extra flirty jokes. 

She acted almost the same around any boy she’d liked, and thinking about it makes her heart beat faster.

-

Mia has Victor now. He’s cute. He’s sweet and funny and charming, and Lake can see how Mia fell for him. 

That doesn’t mean it doesn’t hurt when Lake sees that he’s not as into Mia as she’s into him. Why wouldn’t he see Mia for all she is? Lake kind of wants to punch him.

She sees him staring at Benji, when he thinks no one else is looking. _Oh_. Suddenly Lake gets it. She still wants to punch him, though. 

Lake has Felix now, too. Felix is fun, attractive in a nerdy way, and a surprisingly good kisser. Lake wants to make it work, she really does. 

She gives in at the dance, lets the whole school see her without a filter. It ends up on creek secrets, but it isn’t bad. 

It doesn’t work though. They don’t have anything in common and Lake doesn’t know how to get past that when her mind always drifts to the person she has the most in common with. 

-

It’s 1:00 in the morning when Lake gets the call. That’s weird, she thinks. No one really calls her this late.

She turns her phone over. It’s Mia. 

“Are you okay?” she says before Mia gets a chance to speak.

“Can you come over?” she asks, voice quiet and choked up. 

Lake is immediately awake. “Yeah, of course.” She throws off the covers and looks through her closet for something to wear. “Is something wrong?”

“Just… let me know when you get here.” 

“Yeah, sure. Yeah.”

Mia hangs up.

Lake orders a Lyft and sneaks out the back door. 

-

Lake sends Mia a quick “I’m here” text.

Mia answers the door in her pajamas, eyes wet. 

“Mia…”

Mia just shakes her head.

-

They don’t say anything on the walk up to Mia’s room. 

“Do you want to watch a movie?” Lake asks as they sit on the bed. Movies are always a good distraction.

Mia shakes her head. 

“Do you want to talk about it?”

“Not right now,” Mia says. And then she starts to cry. 

“Shit, Mia,” Lake says and wraps her up into a hug. Mia clings on tight.

And then Mia stops crying. She’s staring up at Lake, and her face shifts into something unreadable.

“Mia, what’s going on-”

Mia kisses her. Mia’s lips are on hers and Lake doesn’t know what to do- she never thought this would happen- so she does what’s natural and kisses back.

She thinks that Mia is going to pull away, come to her senses about what she’s actually doing, but she doesn’t. She doesn’t stop.

-

They don’t talk about it, after. 

“I should go,” Lake says, finding her things. “I don’t want my mom to have a heart attack if she sees I’m not home.” She laughs nervously. She really doesn’t want to go.

“Okay.”

“I’ll see you at school?”

Mia gives her a weak smile. “Yeah.”

Lake’s mind is racing on the Lyft home. 

She gets back in her house and in her bed without incident. She doesn’t sleep. 

-

Mia is avoiding her. 

It’s been a week and Mia has gone as far as switching seats in a class they share together. They’ve had the same seats all year. 

Other people are starting to notice. 

Andrew bumps into her in the hallway. 

“What’s up with you and Mia?” he asks. 

Lake glares at him. “Shut up, Andrew.”

He holds both of his hands up “Okay, okay. Damn. Subject dropped.”

“Good. Now, if you’ll excuse me,” Lake says and walks away. 

-

Another week goes by and Lake is lonely. 

It’s not like she doesn’t have other friends. She goes to dinner with a few of them, goes to the mall with another. It’s just not the same at all. 

First of all, none of them make her feel like Mia does, but none of them know her as well either. Mia calls Lake on her bullshit, has years of experience dealing with her moods, matches her in a way no one else does. 

She’s just… _lonely_. People give her looks, but no one else asks her about it. 

One part of Lake wishes they would. She wishes she had a reason to be petty and mean, to put something on creek secrets. She doesn’t, of course. It still hurts. 

-

“We need to talk,” Lake says, pulling Mia into a storage closet. 

“What the hell, Lake! I have a test.”

“No. You’re gonna stay right here and listen to me. Got it?”

Mia doesn’t look at her. 

“Why did you kiss me? Why are you acting like you never want to see me again? What is this, some sort of sexuality crisis? Is it really worth losing a decade long friendship over?”

“I’m sorry,” Mia says, playing with the straps of her bag. 

“Is that it?”

Mia looks like she’s going to say something, but she stops. Her expression softens a little, and she makes eye contact. 

“We’ll talk later, okay?” and then she’s gone. 

-

Lake can’t stop pacing around her room. Mia agreed to come over after school, and she’s so nervous. She hates that feeling, she’s never really been nervous around Mia before. 

She pays extra attention to the way she looks, triple checking her makeup and spraying a little extra of the perfume Mia got her for her birthday. It’s just Mia, but this is so different. 

-

“Can I… sit?” Mia asks, gesturing to the bed. 

“Go ahead.” Lake makes no move to sit beside her. 

“Lake… I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have done that. It’s just…”

Lake does sit then, keeping some distance between them. “What?”

“It was my mom. She called me.”

“Shit, Mia.”

“She didn’t even say anything, but it was her. I know it was. I just wanted a distraction from everything and I didn’t think and it was a shitty thing for me to do.”

Lake nods. “Okay.”

“Okay,” Mia says, looking down at her hands. “I don’t really know how to have this conversation, but I… I liked it. I liked what we did. And I don’t know what to do with that.”

“You did?” Lake can’t believe what she’s hearing. 

“I did. I didn’t even know it at the time, I don’t think. I just wanted to feel something else.”

“I get why you did it, even though I think I deserve better than that,” Lake says. 

Mia huffs. “You do. You do deserve better.”

Lake cuts her off with a wave of her hand. “I liked it too.”

“Would you want to maybe, you know, do it again?” Mia asks, looking down at her hands. 

“God, yes,” Lake says, and closes the gap between them. 

-

They make out for a few minutes before Lake hears her front door open, and that’s enough to scare her from doing anything else. 

“I should go,” Mia says. 

“You don’t have to. It’s not like they’ll know anything, and you’re here all the time.”

Mia shakes her head. “My dad’s gonna be back tonight anyway.”

“Okay. I’ll walk you out?”

-

They go get coffee at Brasstown the next weekend. It’s… a date. Lake wasn’t entirely sure until she saw the shy smiles Mia was giving her and the playful touches. And the hand holding. Mia is _actually_ holding her hand in broad daylight. 

“Oh my god. Are you guys like… on a date?” Benji asks when Lake goes to order for both of them. 

Lake looks over at Mia. “Yeah. Yeah, we are.”

**Author's Note:**

> unbeta'd. reblog on [tumblr](https://lovelyvictor.tumblr.com/post/628562926563901440/so-pretty-it-hurts-ao3-t-2694-words-lake)


End file.
